Why do we explore habits? Questions help reveal not only our intentions in detail, but also that we recognized what we are currently not (yet) satisfied with. I started to learn more about how to transform my habits, because I wanted to minimise struggle and maximise optimal experience. Find more ease to authentic expression. No rigid structures, rather a blend of stability and creativity. Building upon our natural automatic wiring capability, neuroplasticity. Creating a lifestyle of Well-being. Sprouting ways of Success in every Life area.
I've had so far fundamentally positive shifts by increasing Awareness and conscious choices: optimising mindset and adjusting environments, so that better habits are formed.
Some shifts happened fairly quickly and obviously, some presented themselves as a sort of quiet (bright) revelation one day.
Let's see what resonates with you and what you want to give a try.
Navigate - Part 2
Read Part 1 here.
Routines and habits
"We are creatures of habit."
Routines are conscious decisions, a set of behaviours, activities we tend to do in sequence. Like a morning or evening routine. Since they become habitual over time, this is a form of choice through which we can influence our automatic programming.
What kind of routines do you currently have?
How much have they become habitual? (The stage when you don't need to pay conscious attention any more, there's no resistance, you just do it.)
Habits are a redundant set of automatic, unconscious thoughts, behaviours and emotions that are acquired through frequent repetition. A habit usually manifests itself as an automatic urge to do something, often triggered by a particular cue.
These are highly efficient ways of Nature: saving energy and optimising energy investment.
The main difference between habits and routines is how aware and intentional you are.
Dr. Joe Dispenza, the author of Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself, says that when you like the new behaviour, you develop an ability to reproduce it at will, independent of condition or environment.
The Subconscious is housing positive and negative identifications which give rise to habits and behaviour. As your habit gets wired in attached with emotions, they'll draw in a corresponding state of Mind.
Essentially, the Body stores habits and skills. (Remember when you are in thoughts and somehow automatically fill in your coffee maker and suddenly realise how many automatic motions you executed without paying full conscious attention.)
This is when first the Body learns how to do it governed by the Mind. Then the Body "becomes" the Mind. Tooth brushing is also a popular example for that.
Caution is needed with habits that are detrimental to our Well-being.
Taking inventory of any negative impact some of your habits may cause, can help with your thought process and new choices.
Which negative effects do you want to eliminate from your Life?
As we choose to change established behavioural patterns, we may come up against the borders of "comfort zone". Signs of discomfort show when the Subconscious is activated: it alerts you that you are attempting to do something new.
The Unknown houses infinite potential.
The tendency to commit to these patterns is one reason why habits can be so hard to break. However, when you learn to create such patterns with intention, you can harness the power of habit and purposefully instill new comfort zones to which your Subconscious will adapt.
Habits are anyway part of our human behaviour, so why not choose to create ones that are actually helpful.
Effort to change
Ways to make it easier.
There are many theories exactly how many days it takes to form a habit. 21? 66? 90?
I use these as mere orientation points. True Science is constant exploration. And our experience of it highly individualized.
The old habits we want changed, are carved into neural pathways which we want to disassemble neurobiologically. In other words: breaking the old circuit and building the new one takes some time and practice. Neuroplasticity is our friend in this matter – the ability to change, grow, reorganize our Brain.
Embracing the unique individual expression of our Lives can empower us throughout our Change Journey.
Consider the following approaches to support your process of Change:
Anchor new habits with existing reliable ones.
Choosing micro changes for easier execution (less resistance).
Sometimes radical shifts will work better.
At times you'll find that building on a slate wiped clean, will be your best choice.
A fresh start and perspective while having integrated the Wisdom of your learnings.
Don't attach accomplishment to guilt.
Meaning that we want to stay away from blaming-shaming ourselves when the progress is not satisfactory. This is a pattern most of us have: not being able to accept satisfaction of where we are currently at. This does not exclude ambition for more. It simply enhances a more empowered mental-emotional state from which we operate, maintaining a healthy Self-esteem.
Making the unfamiliar familiar.
Until the New becomes natural. We shall make a conscious effort to remember that we are in the middle of a process and don't need to be masters of something the moment we started it. Patience and Awareness take us from the unfamiliar, uncomfortable to the more and more familiar and handling our habit more confidently stage.
Remove external dependencies in habit formation as much as possible.
This step will require a broadening of perspective, so that you may see opportunities that you haven't seen before.
Look for ways that allow for greater flexibility.
How can you detach your choices from dependencies that seem to be a hindrance?
Calibrate and celebrate
When you reward yourself and celebrate progress, savouring the moment helps anchoring the positive experience. This elevated emotional state will stay memorable and can help through less motivated moments.
Change needs a balance of work-reward-recharge.
Keep playing and experimenting.
Lightheartedness and Flow are part of this process. They actually arise more so in these states. Flow is inhibited by states of stress.
Reframe "failure"
An even perceived as "failure", provides valuable (optimisation) data and insight for future decisions. This is part of evolving our mindset. From Fixed to Growth.
A "fluidity of Mind". Which means we can more effortlessly shed bias, misconceptions and take chances, apply creative approaches, playfulness and spontaneity.
Adaptability
Habit mastery becomes obvious when you can very quickly find your ways to exercise your habits and induce Flow even in regularly changing environments, just as much as in their original Home environment.
Change is constant, so is Adaptation.
Self-empowerment
What if we already go into every new venture like that: "I'm going to try this and if it doesn't feel right, it is in my power to change the course of my actions for the better. Every ounce of experience brings me closer to my goal."
Compound effect and kaizen
Incremental improvements. Compound results.
kaizen [kʌɪˈzɛn] NOUN : a Japanese business philosophy of continuous improvement of working practices, personal efficiency, etc.
Habits add up. Seemingly small, consistent investment with great rewards. Utilising the compound effect for our benefit.
Incremental progress is a relatively gentle way of Change: it can lure the Ego into positive Change fairly effectively while boosting Confidence in the process by providing feedback through micro actions.
The feeling of being rewarded is a very important element in successfully implementing habits. Those incremental changes have immense long-term transformation ability.
(Due to our time perception we sometimes underestimate or even belittle small changes. Sounds familiar?)
Then there are large-scale changes. Transformation. A much shorter timespan to digest the difference. That is a process our human set-up needs more practice to adapt to. Where those grand characteristics of you as a Leader come into play: being Courageous, Visionary, Resilient.
How this positive Change process can look like:
Recognizing that something is "off"
Exploring answers to "how can this be better?"
Making conscious choices on what to change.
Daring to experiment with how to change. Working with those incremental steps.
Looking for learning first and foremost, and seeing "failure" as useful information for adjustment.
Starting to introduce playfulness and creativity into the #habitbuilding process. Tailoring it.
We build habit-formation into the Work here, so that these concepts and methods don't gather dust on your Mind's shelves, but you learn to find ease in implementing them.
What are those things you have wanted to try, optimise, change for a while already?
What are the benefits of taking a small step today in their direction?
What is your overall gain that makes it worthwhile to start now?
Consistency and motivation are key in habit building. So is "getting back up".
We are working with these elements so that they become more effortless.
Flow habits - highest leverage
Identifying ways to induce, amplify, maintain and best harness Flow through habits.
Flow is your optimal state.
Because it influences all areas of your Life most beneficially, we tie habit-formation to Flow.
I wrote a dedicated post on this Integrating Flow – increasing our quality of Life, that will complement the information you've gathered here.
Duhigg named the habits that have stacked benefits "keystone habits"– they generate a positive ripple effect which helps to uphold healthy routines. Although he didn't tie this in with Flow, but we do.
You can identify your own most powerful habits by evaluating how many positive benefits they help produce.
For some of us it's Meditation – better sleep, more focusing power, inner balance, a healthier Brain, reduced stress symptoms, enhanced Self-/Awareness and more.
Exercise of any form – deeper sleep, well-functioning immune system, greater lung capacity, flexibility and healthy blood flow, boost energy, balanced mood, connecting to Nature and more.
It can be Family-Friends-social events, healthy sleep patterns, good eating, minimalism (to keep our inner and outer environment clutter-free), Gratitude, positive Self-talk.
Habitual thoughts and emotions are really precursors of our habitual actions, so we want to make sure we optimise those with priority.
Growth Mindset, fluidity of Mind, Mindfulness, practising being present are habits that help shed misconceptions, bias, limits. They encourage a higher quality thinking which helps with higher quality Awareness and clarity for better choices.
Qualify your habits
Observation helps qualify your habits.
“Bad” habits leads us towards unwanted goals or away from consciously selected aims. “Good” habits involve an enhanced cognitive control, they lead us into a consciously chosen direction that is also intuitively aligned, where we feel strengthened, release stress and gain balance in Well-being.
In the classical Aristotelian view, when someone acquires a (good) habit, they perform the action: (1) more easily; (2) more efficiently; and (3) with higher enjoyment.
How do your current habits serve you in the best way?
Which of your habits help induce an optimal state?
Which ones contribute to your Life quality and Well-being, cause Joy?
What's your experience with habits?
How do you keep them inspiring, consistent and enjoyable?
What's your experience with the compound effect?
When you look at your choices today, which ones belong to the incremental or "to be transformed" category?
Habits and Leadership
I'd like to make it even more obvious why I chose to integrate habit formation into the Coaching Work with Leaders who are keen to accelerate their Personal Growth, their level of Awareness and optimise choices that lead to an increasingly higher quality Life.
As a Leader you are an example. An example by the ways you are living. An example of choices you make: your behaviour and therefore your habits that are part of your behaviour.
Our habitual behaviour are not only certain activities we do, but the thoughts and emotions, and the related moods we habitually have.
When you are living a Life in which you most of the time feel energised, uplifted, you have a sense of Meaning, you go about your days purposefully and balanced, your dominant mood will be most likely highly positive.
Even when you encounter adversity and obstacles, but you have a Growth Mindset with which you can turn these into opportunities and overcome temporary phases of stress, you will still be able to maintain that balanced, positive mood that defines you more than the temporary stress ever could.
I trust that I could express the interconnectedness in what we do here: how your Awareness and choices, including the habits you choose to integrate, lead to an increased quality of Life and Leadership.
The Work together
The goal: maintaining and increasing our Quality of Life.
The #innerwork helps us identify what truly matters - that's the basis of our habit choices, so that they reliably help realise our Life goals.
We'll talk about #habitformation, Consciousness naturally is part of the work here, so that we integrate the learning by practices along the way.
In our work together compounding/kaizen is an essential concept we integrate, discuss, tailor, adjust for your long-term Success.
This Work promotes discernment and making conscious choices involving intuitive insight.
A Life that is more successful, whole and fulfilling, because it fosters a healthy Balance of:
Well-being, resilience, achieving, creating, evolving, learning, leading in inspiring ways, increasing Self/Awareness, progressively better decisions, optimal habits.
Maintaining Flow, a sense of Inner Peace and a healthy connection to Self, guided by a deeply purposeful Life Vision are the result.
It's Self-actualizing and Self-transcendence at once. Thriving and leading by example.
It requires a belief that all this is possible. You can make that choice. I did. We all can.
Habits help piece together your greater plan.
How you achieve those things you define as Success.
How you role model your evolution.
How you integrate your most valued principles in your Leadership.
How you become a better Leader through knowing yourself.
All resting upon the inner work you do.
To continue the conversation within the framework of Coaching and Mentoring
I invite you to...
utilise the Self-evaluation questions link on the website, and I'll also send a form designed for Discovery.
Feedback, questions and sharing are most welcome.
What kind of new insights have you gained? Could you eliminate some doubts? Confirmed certain priorities to yourself as you read through? Ignited new light bulbs?
If you want to share your ideas around this theme or specific questions about what you are currently focusing on solving-improving, simply send me a message.
In the meantime enjoy your contemplation time as you learn to improve your Life and Leadership.
Tamara
Recommended Resources
Same books and videos as in Part 1.
Stephen R. Covey: The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. No wonder it's become a classic. It is easy to understand and comprehensive. Teaching how to change our way of thinking and perception, embody desired Values and achieve desired results.
Dr. Joe Dispenza: Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself. In my view, one of the best out there to explain in simple language the science of how our Brain and Mind work and how we can change.
Charles Duhigg: The Power of Habit. Why we do what we do in Life and Business. or Why we do what we do and how to change. He describes the nature of habits: how the Brain creates a "habit loop" through cues, routines and rewards. This way the habit gets ingrained. We only need to make sure it is the good, contributing habits we ingrain (hardwire). A very important notion: willpower can be learned/increased. We need to become aware of what drives our behaviour and decide ahead of time, how we are going to respond to our specific triggers when they show up through (most often) unconscious behaviours.
His short description of the 4-steps to change a habit: How Habits Work - Charles Duhigg
An animated summary I found quite useful The Power of Habit Charles Duhigg - YouTube
BJ Fogg: Tiny Habits. On his homepage BJ (behavioural scientist at Stanford) explains the basic principles with (really) tiny habits. Welcome | Tiny Habits. He focuses on behavioural design in order to get started and engineer lasting Change.
James Clear: Atomic Habits. Similar to tiny habits, though here the compound effect is emphasized and choosing the for you right system for Change.
His article on The Habit Loop: 5 Habit Triggers That Make New Behaviors Stick (jamesclear.com) can provide some good insight as well and incorporates Duhigg's "habit loop".
Greg McKeown: Essentialism. The Disciplined Pursuit of Less. About optimal energy investment for highest yield and disciplined thinking as a way of living.
Carol Dweck: Mindset. Changing the way you think to fulfil your potential. This book is quoted by many others and is one of the most fundamental concept descriptions on Fixed vs. Growth Mindset and how they influence our level of Success.
Ethan Schwandt does book reviews with mind maps. I'm adding his most recent
And another related one: Five Things I Learned About Habits From 100+ Books - YouTube
These are very useful as they not only reference many valuable core resources, but Ethan is providing the framework how to work effectively with habits in practical sequence. All the best bits are integrated naturally in the Work here too. I like to recommend various resources, because we can integrate learnings more deeply when we explore the same thing from different angles - as one of my favourite Mentors Joseph Rodrigues likes to put it too.
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